My First Mother's Day

I haven't posted in awhile. February was a bad month. March was a busy month. April was my "let's just sit and relax for a minute" month and now I'm back.

A lot has happened since I last posted. Eloise is now 6 months old. How is the hell is that even possible!

Also, is it too early to start planning for her awesome Halloween birthday party? I may or may not have a Pinterest board full of ideas already.

Even with all the change and running around though, I'm still amazed by Eloise. It's been six months and I still stare at her like I did when she was only hours old.

I'm amazed that I get to be her Momma! I'm not trying to be dramatic and add a little flare. I genuinely look at her every day and can't believe she's all mine.

My first Mother's day has now come and gone. It was perfect.

I woke up to flowers and a card from Eloise and lots of cuddles...even Josie jumped in! We poured ourselves a big cup of coffee (Ellie got a bottle) and we sat out on the screened in porch and watched Josie run around like a crazy dog.

Jordan got yard work done that we have been procrastinating on and I got house work done that I've been trying to get to. Everyone except me took a nap at one point.

It was ribs and margaritas for dinner, cuddles and lots of kisses and the day ended with a movie.

It may not have been the most exciting day but it was my perfect day spent with the people that mean the world to me.

I hope you all had a perfect Mother's day as well.

Next on our fixer upper to do list...our hall bathroom and the screened in porch. Pictures to come!

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I love you, Grandpa

Together again in Heaven. My Grandpa, my Great Grandpa and my Uncle. Three generations of McGregors. 

Grandpa and I last Christmas

Grandma and Grandpa ❤

I'm really not good about opening up. Jordan can vouch for me on that. With that being said, when I'm sad, overwhelmed or even excited, I write. I wrote this a week ago and have been going back and forth on whether or not to keep it to myself or to share it. I decided, for the sake of trying to be more open, I'll share. Not only that, my Grandpa was an amazing man and deserves to live on through our stories and memories of him.

On Wednesday February 8th, I got a call from my Mom that my Grandpa was being rushed to the hospital. My Grandma went in to wake him that morning and he wouldn't wake up. From there, the hospital sent him to Hospice. Hospice then told us that he did have much longer with us.

I waited all day to hear...well...anything. Every time my phone rang, my stomach sank.

That afternoon, I got a chance to talk to him. He couldn't respond but I was able to tell him I love him and that was more than I could have asked for in that moment.

Later in the day; still waiting. Phone rings. Same news. The day went on and on like this.

Finally, Jordan got home and I decided to start packing for the worst. I knew that we would be heading up to Iowa shortly, I just didn't know when. Either way, I wanted to be prepared to hop in the car and get to my family and my Grandma as soon as possible.

There was only one problem...Jordan was scheduled for surgery the next day. Nothing big, but we couldn't reschedule and it would definitely keep him down and out all day.

Regardless, we prepared.

My Mom, who was originally going to help me with Jordan and Ellie was already half way up to Iowa. So I called my best friend...my sister.

She helped me line up a place for Josie, who got to stay with her best doggie friend, Cooper (my sister's boyfriends dog) and she drove an hour and a half to meet me in Harrison to help me with Eloise during Jordan's surgery.

Thursday morning rolled around. No new news, but I did get to talk to him again and tell him I love him one last time. Jordan and I then packed up the car, Josie and Eloise and made the hour long trek to Harrison.

The minute we hit Harrison, my phone rang. My stomach sank. My eyes started to tear up. I knew it was the call I'd been dreading.

It was.

My sweet Grandpa was gone. The man who let me think I was sneaking Oreo's from him as a kid. The man who would hug me with the biggest smile when he saw me. The man who would get our entire family of 27 together every year no matter the cost, was gone. I'd never see him again, talk to him again, hug him again...and just typing that was a big punch to the gut.

We stayed put to let Jordan rest that day. First thing Friday morning, my sister, brother, Jordan, Eloise and I packed the car and made the 7 hour trip to Iowa.

It was unreal. I kept looking for him only to remember he wasn't there and in those short moments of searching, I had forgotten the empty feeling I'd been feeling for two days. Although, the feeling always came back like 20 bullets.

I may have felt broken, but I stayed strong. Not only was my husband still on some heavy duty pain killers from surgery and I had a 3 month old to take care of, but because I knew that what I was feeling wasn't close to what my Mom, Aunts and especially my Grandma was feeling.

During the funeral, I got a chance to talk to a woman who used to work for my Grandpa. Years ago, she had a son that was born with health problems. He had over 20 surgeries done and she said she was out for a total of 5 months in two years because of that. Her son ended up passing away after his 2nd birthday but she said the one thing that always stuck with her was sitting in that hospital and meeting all the families who had lost their jobs because they had missed so much time from work. She said she was so thankful for my Grandpa who not only allowed her to miss work when she needed to and always held her job for her but helped raise over $40,000 to help her with medical expenses. My Grandpa did amazingly kind things throughout his life that no one ever knew about and that is a special kind of person. A person who does kind things for others without expecting anything in return and no urge to share their good deed with the world is an incredible person. The world needs more people like that.

I won't keep going on. Instead I'll leave you with the song that was played at my Grandpa's funeral. This song was such a perfect choice, you would think he picked it out himself.

My Grandpa loved Frank Sinatra. I love Frank Sinatra. When I heard this song, it took me back to 5 years ago when I was driving my Grandma and Grandpa to Gull Lake for our family vacation. While my Grandma took a nap in the back seat, my Grandpa and I turned on Frank Sinatra and we listened to 'Ol Blue Eyes together.

Until I see you again, Grandpa. I love you.

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Hospital Bag: What I'll Pack Next Time

First and foremost, DON'T OVER PACK!

I know that's a lot easier said than done but I packed based on those long list's I found on Pinterest and I used maybe 10% of it. Instead, it was just more for my sweet and exhausted husband to carry around when he didn't need to.

So, here is what you will actually need based on what I used while in the hospital.

MOMMA

Leggings, Tunic, Shoes, Nursing Bra, Flip Flops, Toiletry Bag

DADDY

Sweatpants, shirt, shoes, Fuzzy socks, Toiletry Bag

BABY

Pajamas, Burp Rag, Binky, Blanket/Swaddle, Boppy

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ELOISE LILL // THREE MONTHS

STATS
Jan 6 - 11lbs 10oz
Jan 28 - 12lbs 6oz

NICKNAMES
Ellie, Lou, Lill, Pumpkin

MILESTONES
She holds her head up very well
She rolled over twice one night (has yet to do it again) I think she was teasing us? ;)
She giggled for the first time today! I've embarrassed myself trying to get her to do it again and she won't.
She follows you with her head
She's starting to notice when I leave her. She starts to work herself up if I walk away and smiles when I come back.
She sleeps anywhere from 4-6 hours at a time at night

SIGNATURE MOVES
She gurgles and rasps her voice
She loves to tell stories
Every time she sees my Mom she fake coughs
She loves cuddling with Momma (Big Momma's girl lately)
She loves to lay on her play mat

FIRSTS
First round of shots
First track meet - the gun doesn't bother her! She's a true track baby, that's for sure.

FAVORITE THINGS
Loves to talk
Music
Loves to be held or in her baby carrier
Her binky
Sucking on her thumb

LEAST FAVORITES
Tummy time/being on her tummy
Naps - GIRL WON'T NAP MORE THAN 20 MINUTES AT A TIME! Momma's going crazy.

FUNNY MOMENT
I was talking to Eloise and she was smiling up a storm. After a bit I was having a hard time getting her to smile so I fake cried and that girl busted out the biggest smile I've ever seen....little shit! HAHA!

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Eloise's Nursery Tour

During my entire first trimester, we were convinced Eloise was a boy. We would've put money on it, kind of convinced! At 21 weeks, when we were told by our ultrasound technician that it was definitely a girl, Jordan and I were quiet and in shock. So quiet that I actually turned to her and said, "I promise we're excited! We were just convinced it was a boy!" Thankfully, she found that funny.

Because I was so certain she was a boy, I had the entire nursery planned out....for a boy! I even had paint swatches sitting in the nursery. The walls were going to be navy or dark grey and it was going to be a camping sort of feel with string lights, a tee-pee, stars on the ceiling...the works.

So, pink was hard. I mean really hard! And this is coming from a woman who loves pink. 

I want to switch out the curtains for something more colorful (but am being super picky) and will decorate her name above her crib a little more, but for now, here is what I have managed to put together!

Add me on Snapchat to see a video tour: kelseyyycase

Items and Where to Buy Them:

Tassel pillow | Fur rug | Crib | Chair | Basket | Silver table (on sale at Hobby Lobby. Originally blue - spray painted silver) | Dresser | Knobs on dresser | Knobs on closet doors | House Kleenex holder | Pink flamingo | Pink fox | Lamp | Curtains (TJ Maxx)

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Christmas in Iowa

I'm finally sharing our Christmas up North. It was cold (well, colder than we are used to) but Eloise got to spend her first Christmas in Iowa meeting family and friends and I was so happy about that. It was one of my favorite things. Seeing family and friends love on her was the absolute best!

She went to her first church service (which she tooted the whole way through). She got to help surprise a much deserved birthday girl. She got to meet her Great Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles, cousins and second cousins, friends...everyone!!! She got lots of presents, cuddles and love!

It was a great trip and we can't wait to see everyone again soon!

Grandma and Grandpa Lindaman with all the grandchildren

 Eloise and Aunt Erica talking about how cool her Mom and Dad are. Right, Erica? ;)

Sweet cousin, Charlie! Just missing a picture with her cousin, Jack. He was a little too busy being a boy! :) 

Aunt Theresa and Aunt Erica and of course Ellie in her Grandma gear!

Cousins Alza, Lakin and Broden

Great Grandma Case

Bath time with Grandma and Great Grandma

Getting cuddles from Aunt Terri and watching cousin Nora play dress up. She put on quite the show singing many songs from Frozen. That girl is an entertainer! ;) 

Great Grandma McGregor

Great Grandpa McGregor and cousin, Halle

Cuddles with Aunt Missy and Aunt Megan

Meeting cousin Greta, who clearly wanted her socks! Do you blame her? :)

Christmas morning

"That's enough of the pictures, Mom."

Hope you all had a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! 

We can't wait to see what 2017 brings! 

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Sleep Deprived Sleep Talking

The last 2 and a half months have been...how do I put this...slightly, uh, tiring?

We are exhausted. All we do is clean, change diapers, sometimes we get to shower and eat a hot meal in the same day but most of all, we day dream about getting a full night of uninterrupted sleep.

Yes - it's all worth it. Yes - we love her very much. But yes - we also miss sleeping (and eating a hot meal, and enjoying a nice long hot shower, and date night).

Because we are running on fumes most of the time, my hilarious sleep talking husband has been in top notch when it comes to our 3am conversations.

The other night I woke up not feeling well. When I climbed back into bed, Jordan gave me a look as if to say, "Where the hell were you?"

Me: "I don't feel well."
Jordan: "Maybe because you're sleeping on a board of old fish."

I wish I was making this up.

Hope you're all getting some good nights sleep. Send one our way!

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Dear Husband and Soon-to-be Daddy...

While I was pregnant, I wrote as a form of stress reliever. While looking through some of the things I wrote, I found this. I never posted it. I never even shared it with Jordan. I kept it to myself but now, I think I'll share.

For all you soon to be Daddy's out there, here's a little insight into what goes through your very hormonal and very pregnant soon-to-be Momma.

Dear Husband...

I can't sleep but I could sleep all day! It doesn't make sense. I know! But, I'm tired all the time. In everything I do through out the entirety of my day...I'm tired. But, when I try, I CAN'T SLEEP! I try everything I can to get a little shut eye for myself, for our unborn daughter and even for you but it doesn't always work. Mainly because I'm sooo uncomfortable. So, if I fall asleep on the couch or tell you that I'm going to lay down, please let me because maybe, just maybe, I will be able to actually get a little shut eye.

These hormones are a bitch. I found myself crying to a cereal commercial one day. It wasn't even cry worthy but I was balling like a baby. If a patient yells at me at work, it makes me want to cry. If I'm frustrated, I want to cry. I just want to cry all the time. I know you know I'm not weak but I need you to understand this baby makes me crazy and when I'm crazy, it doesn't help to hear I'm being crazy. So, let me have those hormonal moments every now and then. Don't worry - I totally see my crazy and try my hardest to stop it.

Food is a constant battle. Please don't let me run out of hot tamales, fruit popsicles, apples and please don't drink the last of the chocolate milk. Why? This is not meant to be selfish. It's just that nothing ever sounds good to eat so when I crave something (which majority of the time is one of the above), I need it and I need it now. Oh - and please stop with the popcorn. The smell makes me want to gag!!!

I'm constantly checking myself out in the mirror. No - it's not because I think I'm hot stuff. It's because I love to see my belly growing and I love to see how different my body can look from one day to the next. Every day, I'm amazed by the amount of change that can occur in 24 hours.

I constantly ache. These stretching pains are no joke! She's growing so quickly and my body is trying to keep up with her but I'm constantly achey. Especially when I wake up in the morning. She must party all night?

You are ALWAYS on my mind. Always. I think about you all day. I think about what you're thinking, feeling, seeing, experiencing. I want to know how you are dealing with all of this change. I want to know if it's even hit you that our world is about to be rocked in t-minus 3 months. I want to know if you wonder what she will look like, act like, sound like, what foods she will like, her favorite color...like I do.

I can't wait to see what you're like with her. I can't wait to see you hold her for the first time, kiss her, rock her to sleep, change her diaper, feed her, make her laugh. I can't wait to see how you discipline her, talk with her, hang out with her, cheer her on and everything in between. I told you I think about you all the time!!!

I love to see you excited about her. Watching you paint her room, precisely put together her crib, talk about how cute her little clothes we have hanging in her closet are...makes me melt. Please never stop being excited about her!

I'm so in love with you. Going through this experience with you has only made me love you more. To be honest, I didn't know that was possible! Keep being the amazing person you are.

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Newborn Survival Products You Didn't Know You Need

Since having Eloise, I've been asked by a few beautiful and new expecting Momma's I know, "What are your must have items you can't live without?" Everyone is different but to help, I thought I'd start by sharing what I can't live without.

1. Plugin Light Dimmer
First and foremost, get yourself a light dimmer. I can't stress this one enough. This is by far my best baby buy!!! For those middle of the night party sessions, this has allowed me to only use the amount of light I need to see but not too much that it fully wakes her up. Seriously. This is my number one answer when others have asked me what they should buy or register for. GET THIS. I mean it!

We use this light dimmer and bought it at Lowes but it's also available on Amazon. I even pack it up when we head out of town. Life saver! Click here to buy!

2. Milk Snob Carseat Cover
I tried the Velcro carseat cover that you see everyone using and I hated it. The Velcro straps kept sliding everywhere and the sides were always open allowing the cold wind to get in at my sweet baby. Then I found the Milk Snob cover and it was like the angels started singing. This cover provides coverage around the entire carseat but allows you to be able to peek in at baby from the top because the fabric is so stretchy.

A plus to this cover... it keeps strangers in Walmart from touching and poking at your clean, germ free baby. Can we all agree the touching other peoples baby's you don't know thing needs to stop?

This is the cover I bought and love. I've been stopped in public many times asking where I got it. The name might be strange but the product doesn't disappoint. Click here to shop!

3. Diaper Caddy/Basket
If you're like us and change baby on the couch in the living room, do yourself a favor and get yourself a diaper caddy or a basket. Instead of running back and forth to the nursery, everything you need can be transported room by room or just stay tucked away in the living room.

This isn't the one we use but you get the point! :)

4. Binky Holder
My Mother-in-Law got me a binky holder that attaches to Eloise's carseat. It's the best! Instead of having to dig through the diaper bag to find the mute button, it's in a fast and easy to grab place all the time.

I believe the holder I have, my MIL bought at a local place in Iowa but I found these online that are similar. Click here to shop! ...Or here!

5. Burp Rags

Get all the burp rags you can! You will use them constantly.

I like the burp rags from Target but Jordan found some bigger ones at Walmart that he likes. Mine absorb better but his are much wider which are nice for the Daddy's shoulders.

My favorite burp rags

Jordan's favorite burp rags

6. Nose Frida

Yes, it's gross. Yes, you might gag. However, when your little one is so congested and is struggling to breath, your Momma bear instinct jumps in and will do just about anything to help them out. 

During the first two weeks after Eloise was born, she was very congested. the Doctor said it was normal for newborns to be congested because they are still trying to get rid of everything they breathed in while in the womb. That's all fine and dandy but my baby girl couldn't breath well and I had to do something about it. The normal bulb nose sucker didn't help and instead just irritated her tiny cute nose. Finally, Jordan and I gave in and bought the Nose Frida and loved it! Jordan (who gag's at everything) was the one who did it to her the most and he had no problem with it. I think it helps when you hear and see the difference it makes for your baby. Buy it here!

Now... as for the FridaBaby Windi...that's still a grey area for us. If you are brave and get it, let me know how it works!

7. Free Prints App

This isn't a must have but it's a nice to have. I downloaded this app a long time ago but didn't really start using it until I started to collect a buttload of pictures of Eloise on my phone and no way to really keep them around. Now at the end of every month, I'm ordering prints of all the pictures I took that month and storing them in a tub I've already started with her keepsakes in it. You can never start organizing too early, right? ;)

Hope this helps! :)

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